When we break up I'm going to do something similar on all my social medias. "We have ended our relationship after thoughtful consideration and still care about each other and will remain civil for our main priority: our cat, Celia." Lol like who gives a fuck?
Social anxiety and general excessive pit sweat got you down? Want to wear your fave articles of clothing but you just know you'll wreck them because they're all up in your pits' grills? Just throw some pantiliners on that shit. Voila. No pit sweat or embarrassing physical traits on your favorite tees and sweaters.
Been trying to really sell my shit on Instagram and saw these IGs where they post your art and they have thousands of followers so I was like THIS must be how ppl have a gajillion followers! So I reached out to one and this is what happened. Figures. Everything's always about money.
Scrolling through my art IG, I ALWAYS come across an "Oddly Satisfying" video of some chick stretching goo. Like. Wtf? I clicked on the video just to see if they actually had followers and likes and they have thousands. Even a shop. Like...ok, so people follow them to watch videos of people stretching goo and then buy the stretchy goo I'm guessing? Life makes no fucking sense.
Oh, and get the fuck off my feed.
Strike #2. Participated in a craft fair to sell all my shit I'd been making: sold 1 thing in 8 hours. Paid Instagram to promote an artwork for 7 days: nothing. Does the world just not care for art and books or do I just suck? Hmm.
Been wanting to do a photoshoot of all my books since I got my new DSLR camera. Took 200. Of just "About a Girl." Just 11 more to go? IDK I've lost count. Now I have to weed through them, but I gave my website a new makeover and added a page called "Gallery" - that's where I'm going to put all my glamour shots, so keep a look out!
The rooms are going for $200-$300 a night, and when people call for a rate and say they found something better online, you're allowed to match it but you have to post the payment and make it prepaid.
Yeah I'm not doing that. I'm just handing out super cheap rates.
Was watching Giada in Italy when this show I've never seen before, "Ayesha's Home Kitchen," was next. Since Food Network has been sucking ass, (i.e. only playing competition shows and no actual cooking ones/have written several letters to said channel as well as Nancy Fuller describing my distaste for the path the channel was going), I was mildly excited. I was thinking, "Okay, I wanted more Giada and Ina and Bobby but this is a step in the right direction."
I started watching it.
It's the worst thing I've ever seen.
So I'm like "Who the fuck is this bitch and HOW did this show pass for a pilot?"
So I do a little research. I google her name, and come across Ayesha Curry. Since she's a cook, I figured that was her show name, like Chelsea Lately or something. Like why would a cook's last name ACTUALLY be Curry? It's a delicious Indian dish.
Scroll down a bit, and Stephen Curry and Ayesha Curry come up in the same sentence. Since I have a baby sister in basketball, I've heard that dumb name before. Because she's corrected me an uncountable amount of times that it's not pronounced Steven. Now I know that, but I still say it for fun.
And it clicks.
This horrible show is only in my face because stupid sports players are rich and can buy themselves a show anywhere even if they have no idea how to do anything.
Fuck. You. Food. Network.