I'm totes into this song by The Sweeplings "In Too Deep." It is now on The Witches soundtrack. I imagine it to go along with the intimate scene, since he's doing something he shouldn't be...
In other news, I'm debating on whether or not I should write a letter to Jared. Just so that if he plans on retiring, or getting any older, or you know, whatever, he should keep in mind that he needs to play my Will in a few years. I've only written two other letters to celebrities: the first one was to Olan Rogers asking if he would ever come out with Balloonshop's skits on DVD (to which he never responded and to this day I still feel a little sad), and the other was to Meg Cabot. It was a very complimenting letter, I will not go into detail. Let's just say I was in an unnaturally humbling mood. I'm usually not that nice. So maybe after I finish Witches I'll write him. 'Cause this is kind of important.
"I would LOVE to receive a YA novel submission similar in tone to new album from @taylorswift13 . I absolutely love 1989!#MSWL"
No. No. No. No. No. No.
"I don't know that I've ever seen a YA mystery (not MG) that stars a black teen girl. Would love to publish one. #mswl"
Okayyyy...why does the ethnicity of a character change anything about anything? But putting that aside as I will receive no answer (and even if I did it wouldn't be worth my time because it would be super dumb), the color of someone's skin is the minorest detail in the entire world that is mentioned maybe once at the beginning of the story. "Theresa loved Brian, he was the love of her life since sixth grade. They loved all the same things, going to the mall, blah blah blah. 'Theresa, your skin is so beautiful,' he said one day, commenting on the warm brown mocha hue..." and that's it. The rest of the story happens. Wow. I'm so glad I made her black, it was so important and crucial to the overall concept.
"You might want to spend less time complaining about agents and more time writing a fantastic book. #querytip"
I already have a fantastic book. Twelve, actually, that you have rejected countless times because they're not about selfies, Taylor Swift, or black characters. I get to complain about you.
"Would love to get a YA mystery based on a folktale with an African American Veronica Mars -like protagonist. #mswl"
My characters are black now.
"I want a YA retelling of Romeo & Juliet set in Israel, between an Israeli & a Palestinian #mswl"
How could that possibly differ from the original Capulets and Montagues? IT'S THE SAME CONCEPT
"YA or New Adult with a female protagonist dealing with revenge porn. Wish it were something that only happens in fiction.#MSWL"
So you...what now?
"If you're an author of color &/or an LGBTQ+ author &/or an author with a disability, query me with your SF/F novel, adult or YA! #MSWL"
Wow. So I'm being punished for being white and able-bodied. It's not like there's minorities when it comes to writers, that's the beauty of querying: you don't know what the author looks like. May their skin be green, let them be an orc, may they have twelve legs. IT IS EQUAL OPPORTUNITY, IT'S NOT LIKE THE HANDICAPPED NEED MORE HELP WITH THEIR WRITING ABILITY, EITHER THEY WRITE GOOD SHIT OR THEY DON'T, THE REST OF US GO BY THE SAME RULES
Alright that's enough for now. I'm starting to only write in all caps.
Alright, so I updated my Witches of Briarwood page with the news but I haven't here, so here it is: I have chosen my characters. To see them click on the page and you will see a picture of some random girl who is just super pretty to be my Hattie and none other than the Jared Padalecki to be my Will, who is from Gilmore Girls and Supernatural. Now, with that said, I have Googled how old Jared is and he is 32. So. If we get this published and adapted into a screenplay we just may have a shot at getting Jared to actually be Will. Which. Would. Be. So. Cool. If not, I'm sure he can pull off looking like a young guy for the next twenty years or so. So we still got some time.
Okay, so I successfully made a twitter and it forced me follow a bunch of people but I couldn't figure out how to link it to this and got scared to post my vent in a mere 44 character message so I panicked and backed out. But had I posted it, this is what it would say:
"Agents who expect you to alter your query according to their website #aintnobodygottimeforthat"
But it's okay. I can just vent on here.
I think I'm going to start tweeting critiques on agents. I kind of take it personally when an agent whines and complains about how uninteresting someone's manuscript is, especially now since agents are looking for garbage like novels on selfies. Let me see if I can figure out how to connect twitter to here. Brb.
Clicked on #mswl just out of curiosity (I saw one time someone was wanting a story on witches so I got a little excited--unfortunately, of course, mine is far from finished so I had to let it go but I was still keen on finding agents who sought my stuff), and came across this post:
'My sister & I were talking about how amazing a humor book on "how to take the perfect selfie" would be. Someone write that & query me. #MSWL'
(Sits here and stares at that post for 17 consecutive minutes. Has nothing to say. Until:)
I mean I can't. I wouldn't know where to start. Well, first allow me to clarify: You...want...a book about...selfies? Selfies. Like. Narcissistic pictures of oneself. No? Oh! Sorry. You're right. Not just any book about selfies, but, more accurately, how to take the perfect selfie. Sorry. No, I think I got it, thanks. I just, um...I just wanted to make sure, that, uh...the reason...my manuscripts are being rejected...is...because...they're not gripping...cliffhanging...stories...about...selfies...
So this was the first day I've checked Writer's Market and this is pretty much how it's been going:
Does not want: Fiction.
Pacific Press rarely publishes fiction, but we're interested in developing a line of Seventh-day Adventist fiction in the future.
Needs: history, regional, hobbies, woodworking.
All query letters or ms submissions must be submitted through an agent or at the request of an editor.
Bright Ring is no longer accepting manuscript submissions.
And that last one doesn't even make sense.
I have graduated. So now I can focus all of my time and attention on finally gracing the world with my awesomeness. You're welcome, world. Now if agents will just cooperate, then we're good to go. But one can't rely on them. For they are lame. But anyway, I'm excited to jump back in, I've literally given my true calling in life no thought whatsoever due to scrambling around in several different cities trying to get projects and portfolios done. So. Here we go. Onward.